So for a very long time I’ve been angry with corporations, it started in the 80’s when the issue came up regarding fast food restaurants using South American rainforest land to graze the cattle they used in their burgers. It was a bad deal, it hurt the environment of South America and took advantage of the people of the Amazon. Public outrage then took over and boycotts etc ensued. So as an answer to this McDonalds produced a commercial to let us all know they were dealing with it. They had a commercial with cowboys sitting around a fire in front of the chuck wagon and the end of the commercial said, McDonalds, serving 100% American Beef. Of course they were playing Americans for suckers, because SOUTH American beef is still AMERICAN beef.

Currently several industries are once again playing us all for suckers. Suddenly, there is clean coal everywhere, coal must have miraculously lost all of it’s polluting side effects. Apparently sulfur no longer pollutes the air causing acid rain, and mountain top strip mining doesn’t hurt the environment, create problematic runoff or screw up streams. That’s right coal is now a magic wonderful way to keep us off of foreign oil without polluting our environment.

But don’t worry, because both the tar sands contingencies and the natural gas folks assure us that if we use those resources everything is beautiful and we no longer need middle east oil. Of course extracting tar sands is highly expensive, starts by deforesting huge tracts of forest and uses massive amounts of water in the extractive process. Of course we also need miles and miles and miles of pipelines to transport all of this down from Canada, it’s not like there are ever problems with pipeline spills.

If that doesn’t work for you then of course you can just switch to natural gas, we’ve got a 400 year supply of cheap, clean and unbelievably efficient burning natural gas. It is the answer to all of our energy problems, and it’s safe, the drilling is well below the water table and fully contained as they fracture the rock and extract the gas. Well, totally safe except that they have to use massive amounts of water and carcinogenic chemicals, at least the ones we know of, they highly guard what chemicals they use. The gas infects the water table, check out the documentary Gasland if you want to get really scared. Of course that’s all just hype, gas companies are paying people to replace their water supplies in contaminated areas out of the kindness of their tiny beating corporate hearts.

Finally, my favorite, corn sugar, is just sugar, there is no problem at all. Well except that it’s used as high fructose corn sugar which ramps up the sugar levels in drinks to the point that a super-sized coke can damn near kill a diabetic.

Want to learn more about these perfectly safe, wonderful and life affirming (please note the sarcasm) industries check out the following links:

Tar Sands

Natural Gas Fracking


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